Here’s a nice example of magical (expectation) thinking.
“I told you what I wanted you to do!”
Oooookay, where to begin with this one? When you hear someone say this (ahem, a boss or manager), I often wonder…
- Was the person paying attention to you when you told them? Are you sure?
- How do you know that the image in your head was what was transferred into their head as you spoke? What response signaled that this was so?
- How do you know they were not just nodding not to rile you up because they didn’t understand and figured they could go and figure it out on their own later when you’re not hovering over them?
- How do you know that you used the right word and not a similar word that confused the person? Have you ever said roast beef when you meant to say corned beef?
- Why do you think the other person has even a similar priority for this as you do? What if their limited time and resources prevents them from getting to this because it is deemed by them to be a lower priority? Do you think your tone is sufficiently clear for them to make this change?
- How do you know if their fear or insecurity prevents them from appropriately handling the task you ask them to do?
- Are you sure they respect you enough to listen to you closely?
- Have you considered the impact of your last instruction to them? What was the last thing you told them to do? What happened with it?
- Have you considered the impact of how you’ve trained them through your previous commands? Training in the sense what has resulted and what was the experience? Did you change your mind a lot?
- Are they just waiting for you to change your mind before they really get started on it? Or do you have a tendency to fib on when things need to be completed, therefore you have no credibility on this emergency item? Or perhaps everything has become an emergency with you therefore nothing is ever an emergency anymore.
Expectation: belief about (or mental picture of) the future.
Believing because you’ve told someone then sufficient action has been taken for the mental picture to come about in the right time, location, and manner.
So…I hate my job because of unreal command expectations.